


Broken spirit, hurtful words

by hwasjun



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Angst, Blood and Injury, Blood and Violence, Dark, Gen, Heated Argument, Heavy Angst, Kidnapping, Kim Hongjoong-centric, Panic Attacks, Park Seonghwa-centric, Suicidal Thoughts, Violence, hongjoong doubts himself, i hope it’s not too bad sigh, seonghwa feels guilty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-12
Updated: 2019-12-29
Packaged: 2020-08-20 03:24:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20221003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hwasjun/pseuds/hwasjun
Summary: As Hongjoong and Seonghwa have a big argument both are left with severe emotions. Hongjoong ends up trying to sneak out of the dorm, fleeing from his anxiety, only to have Seonghwa follow him. Both the men walk right into a trap as they get kidnapped by an obsessive fan and his criminal brother. will their emotions be in the way of saving themselves? will the other ateez members come find them after being divided by the fight?please read the tags and warnings, this au deals with anxiety, borderline selfharm, self hate, panic attacks, kidnapping, violence, sedatives, torture, harassment and maybe more sensitive topics. read at your own risk.





	1. Mean words cause bad thoughts

**Author's Note:**

> i think this is part 1 of 2 but i’m not sure yet how big this’ll be !! pls enjoy uwu !

Hongjoong frowns and turns to face Seonghwa. “What did you say?” He sneers, eyes sharp.

Hwa scoffs and crosses his arms before speaking. “I don’t get why you’re the leader, all you do is nag and criticize us.”

The two are standing in front of each other, it’s 7:30 pm and the other members are chilling in their rooms while the eldest members are over in the living room, spitting insults back and forth.

“Well if you didn’t fuck up at practice we wouldn’t been able to stay at home today!” Hongjoong starts raising his voice, making Seonghwa back up a bit.

“How is it my fault I literally recovered from an injury three days ago!” The singer now also starts yelling, feeling attacked.

Hongjoong growls. He opens his mouth, but Seonghwa cuts him off.

“You didn’t even try at practice yesterday! Who are you to say it’s my fault when you pulled that shit as well, _ leader!!” _ Seonghwa puts emphasis on leader in a very mocking manner.

“You act like you’re so great but just admit you make mistakes yourself as well, instead of always blaming the others!” The older huffs as he finishes, his hands balled into fists next to his hips.

Then suddenly Hongjoong pushes him. Seonghwa stumbles backwards, but doesn’t fall because the couch behind him stops him.

Wooyoung and San come running down the stairs at the sound of Seonghwa slamming against the couch and quickly step in.

San grabs Seonghwa and Wooyoung holds Hongjoong. 

“I wish you never debuted with us Seonghwa!” Hongjoong yells at the top of his lungs. He’s panting and his knuckles turn white from making tight fists.

Seonghwa freezes for a moment.

“Hyung come on, let’s calm down..” San tries, but tears roll down Seonghwa’s face.

“And I wish you were never even born!!” He screams, straining his muscles, his voice cracking. Immediately Seonghwa covers his mouth. 

The tears double as Seonghwa runs off to his room, locking himself in his bathroom.

Hongjoong’s eyes go wide as shock hits him. The words which were just yelled at him force their way into his head as he starts to shake a little.

San curses before rushing to Hongjoong.

Together with Wooyoung he tries to get him to the couch to sit down but instead Hongjoong’s legs give out and he drops to the floor.

“Am I really that bad?” He whispers. His hands find their way into his hair and he pulls, hard.

San drops into a crouch and wraps an arm around the shaking leader. “No? What are you talking about hyung?” He frowns.

At that moment Hongjoong’s sleeves slip down his arms and they reveal self inflicted scratch marks on the tops of his wrists.

Wooyoung notices and his eyes go wide, but he doesn’t do anything irrational in case Hongjoong gets scared. 

He lowers himself and hugs Hongjoong from the front, lifting him up again.

Hongjoong heavily leans on Wooyoung. His legs feel weak and weird, like they’re not where they’re supposed to be. 

His eyes water as they close half way. He softly starts to sob as he limply wraps his arms around Wooyoung’s back also burying his face in the younger’s shoulder.

Wooyoung is surprised, for sure, but he quickly responds by pulling Joong closer and resting a hand in the rapper’s hair.

“You’re okay hyung..” San whispers, standing close by the two, but also giving the crying member his space.

Meanwhile Seonghwa had barged out of his bathroom, having tried to calm himself down by splashing water into his face.

Now he moves back into his room, blocking the door to his bedroom with a chair. He drags his feet towards his bed, stumbling and falling as he goes.

The young man gasps for air as he claws at his chest, crying and starting to breathe alarmingly fast. 

The guilt is making him feel sick and the panic is gripping his windpipe, keeping him from taking deep breaths.

Yeosang bangs on the closed door, calling out for Seonghwa as he hears the heart wrenching noises from inside.

The older doesn’t come, feeling the sudden need and urge to vomit, he tries to stand to make his way back to the bathroom, but Hwa crashes down on his knees again, the world spinning.

Seonghwa coughs as he hysterically tries to gasp for air through his sobs.

“Hyung!!” Yeosang shouts, worried sick as he busts the door open. The chair goes flying against the first bed and Yeosang stumbles from the sheer force he used to enter.

Seonghwa has now crawled into a corner, shaking as he holds his hands to his chest, tears _ streaming _ down his pale face.

“Hyung you’re having a panic attack please I-I don’t know what to do!” Yeosang’s hands frantically flutter over Seonghwa’s form. The older not responding at all.

“Just wait here, I’m getting Hongjoong hyung!” Yeosang sputters, getting up. He turns around only to get his shirt grabbed by a trembling hand.

“N-Not Hongjoong..” Seonghwa’s bloodshot eyes look like he saw a ghost as he stares up at Yeosang.

His tears don’t slow down and his breath hitches violently. “I-I-I told him to die..” Though his words are exaggerated, they feel true to Seonghwa in his frightened state.

Yeosang is at a loss of words. “You what?” He kneels again, holding Seonghwa’s face in his hands, but the latter turns unresponsive again.

As Yeosang is about to remove his hands he notices Seonghwa’s breathing starts to slow down. 

His eyes are closed as he leans into Yeosang’s touch. His hands falling into his lap as the tension leaves his limbs.

Yeosang moves closer, almost scooping Seonghwa onto his own lap. The taller rests against Yeosang’s chest as he starts dozing off.

The short breathing got the better of him, exhausting him together with his racing emotions.

After he cried silently into Wooyoung’s shoulder Hongjoong was put into bed by the two.

When the older fell asleep Wooyoung pulled San gently out of the room, his eyes telling the other it’s important.

“What is it Wooyoung?” San asks, curious but also concerned by seeing the stern look on the blonde’s face. 

“I think hyung... hurts.. himself.” Wooyoung makes small pauses, his face contorted with worry.

San has the same reaction as Wooyoung had earlier. His eyes go wide and he turns around, aiming to go straight back to check on his brother.

Wooyoung stops him, biting his lip. “Not like cutting or burning.. He scratched his wrists, here.” Wooyoung rubs the soft skin on top of his wrists.

“So that makes it less bad?” San sounds mad, but also confused. As if he’s not sure of the answer to his own question.

“At least less dangerous.” Wooyoung is careful with the words he chooses to say, not knowing enough about this to say it confidently. 

He gestures to the inside of his wrist and San gets what he means.

No words are spoken for a moment.

Then Jongho arrives. “Why is Yeosang sobbing in Seonghwa and Hongjoong hyung’s room?” He softly asks.

The two look up, slightly startled by his quiet arrival.

San looks at Wooyoung, the latter sighing and resting his hand on Jongho’s shoulder before going back into San’s room, where Hongjoong is sleeping. 

San gives Jongho a hug and the youngest member doesn’t protest, stressed by all the worrying emotions in the dorm.

The two share a moment like that, no words spoken, no noises or movements, just the warm and comforting feeling of a hug fills their bodies.

“Something happened between Seonghwa hyung and Hongjoong hyung...” San breaks the silence with nothing less than a whisper. Anger ranges in his veins now that he knows about Hongjoong’s scratches.

Jongho just nods, his voice hiding in his throat. He slowly releases the hug. “What about Yeosangie? Did something happen to him as well?”

San’s eyes can’t hide the worry as he admits he doesn’t know. Yeosang has always been the frantic one who gets easily stressed and worried.

“Can we go check up on him?” Jongho’s simple request pulls at San’s heartstrings as he agrees.

Once in Seonghwa’s room they see a whimpering Hwa and a sobbing Yeosang.

The younger seems completely helpless as his hands cling to Seonghwa in attempts to calm him in his nightmare.

“Hyung.” Jongho’s voice cracks as he tries to keep it as soft as possible and he covers his own mouth in response. He doesn’t want to wake Seonghwa.

Yeosang shoots up, clearly distressed and startled. “J-Jongho.” He chokes out as he sees their youngest member.

“Ah!” Seonghwa winces, banging his feet against the end of the bed. His face is sweaty and still pale as he struggles, trapped in his horrid dream.

“Hyung!” Yeosang turns back to him, holding his face as he lets out a desperate noise.

“Jongho could you go grab a cold towel?” San asks, he pushes down his anger, or at least he tries, as he gives Jongho the request.

Jongho nods before running off and San stays where he is, standing not far into the room, ready to leave at any moment.

“Shhh Seonghwa it’s okay..” Yeosang’s frantic eyes dart over the older’s face to check on any signs of him calming down.

San studies Seonghwa and Yeosang, seeing how the oldest member’s hands are clawing at the sheets in fear. “You need to wake him up.”

Yeosang doesn’t hear San. 

“Yeosang you need to wake Seonghwa hyung up!” San walks up to Yeosang and grabs the his shoulder this time, pulling his attention to his words.

Yeosang shakes his head. “He’ll have another panic attack, we can’t-“ He stops talking, shaking his head faster.

San growls, his anger flowing out as he grabs Seonghwa and carelessly shakes him. “Hyung!”

The older opens his eyes, his whole body flinching violently as he looks around in horror. “Hongjoong! H-Hongjoong..!”

Seonghwa is still shaking as San grabs him by the collar. “Get up.”

Seonghwa can’t comprehend the situation, Jongho comes running in with a tub of water and a towel, his expression worried, Yeosang is begging San to be gentle, also questioning him why he’s being so cruel to Seonghwa. San still has his grip around the singer’s shirt as he pulls and tugs until Seonghwa hurries out of bed. Tripping and crawling.

The first thing San does when Seonghwa is on his feet is push him. 

Seonghwa, who has now had a tiny, disturbing, rest can think reasonably clearly now that the panic has subsided after waking up. He processes the push and looks up at San, his expression puzzled.

“It’s _ your _fault hyung.” San’s voice is laced with deadly venom as he sneers at the older. “You’re ruining him, you’re sick!”

Seonghwa’s eyes grow bigger and his pupils shrink. “What are you talking about San?”

“Hyung scratches himself,” San _ growls _before pausing, raising his hand and stepping closer to Seonghwa is a threatening manner.

“Hongjoong hyung has scratched his wrists because of the anxiety ** _you _ **give him!!” San points and points and points and Seonghwa takes unstable steps back as San approaches him.

All this info shocks everyone in the room besides the one who brought the news. 

Jongho is silent and Yeosang is nervous, the latter wanting to say something but being shut up by Joong’s secret. 

He fiddles with the hem of his shirt as he thinks about what to do next, but San doesn’t give him any time.

“Seonghwa hyung what did Hongjoong hyung do to you? Why are you making him so miserable!” San yells and he yells and Seonghwa ends up in the corner of the room, a fuming brother in front of him.

“Shut up San!!” Yeosang finally opens his mouth, upset about this unjust treatment for his close friend. “It’s _ not _ Seonghwa hyung’s fault okay!”

San’s eyebrows raise and he growls. As he turns around Yeosang puffs up his chest and also balls his fists. 

“I want you to leave.” He simply says, eyes dark and confident.

San huffs, annoyed. He leaves the room, not saying a word, leaving Jongho with Yeosang and Seonghwa. 

Yeosang walks up to Seonghwa, holding his hand and taking him back to bed. “You need to rest hyung..” The younger manages to say with a smile.

Seonghwa does feel tired but he’s also still very worried and upset about all of this. He lays down on the bed and watches Yeosang’s face as he tucks him in gently. 

“Jongho?” The brunette quietly calls for their youngest member, not sure on whose _ ‘side’ _ he is.

“Yes hyung? Should I get you something? Do you want me to leave or stay?” As expected, Jongho is just concerned for everyone, not wanting conflict or people getting hurt in any way.

Yeo can’t help but let a fond smile creep into his lips. “Thank you Jongho..” He murmurs, squeezing Seonghwa’s hand, who’s luckily starting to fall asleep again.

“Stay if you want. You don’t have to get us anything, if he has a nightmare again we have water.” The older gestures towards the bowl Jongho had been holding.

Jongho smiles gently, walking up to them and hugging Yeosang. 

* * *

Days go by and the atmosphere doesn’t get better, the members eat separately, Hongjoong is seen less and less by the others and Seonghwa doesn’t nag at all, instead he’s uneasily quiet.

San and Wooyoung eat in their room and bring food to Hongjoong if he lets them. Yeosang brings food for himself and Seonghwa whenever Seonghwa is too anxious to join the rest of the group in the kitchen.

Yunho, Mingi, Jongho and sometimes Yeosang and Seonghwa eat together for every meal, since they finally have the chance to have some proper time to themselves since they’re on a break from all the schedules. 

But the break also means the members are at home most of the time and that doesn’t help the open wound heal. The two sides haven’t talked at all. Mingi, Yunho and Jongho being the neutral members, who jump from side to side, making sure everyone is at least okay.

Hongjoong started coming out of San’s room at night, when most members are sleeping. But Seonghwa has too.

The older of the two has seen Hongjoong eat, read and just sit and stare.

Seonghwa starts growing more and more concerned about Hongjoong’s wellbeing when one night he comes to the living room, witnessing how Hongjoong walks to the front door, walking, more like sneaking.

He’s all dressed and he’s carrying a medium sized bag, as if he’s gonna leave or sleep somewhere else.. Hongjoong puts on a cap and opens the door as Seonghwa hurries to put on a coat to go after him.

_This can’t be good.._


	2. Walking into the mouth of danger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was supposed to go up on monday but since i had a depressive episode i suddenly got angst inspiration so i decided to finish writing this chapter! i hope it’s okay!! <33

Seonghwa snags the key off the wall and sneaks after Hongjoong silently. His phone is in his left pocket and the keys are now in his right.

Hongjoong grabs his hair as he walks, not looking where he’s going. He groans and then sniffles, making Seonghwa flinch.

The leader is way too much in his own world to even realize the older is following him, crying on the semi-deserted streets.

The night air is surprisingly cold and Hongjoong keeps hiding his neck in his coat, not wearing a scarf to warm the sensitive part of his body.

The bright neon text of some signs light the cold sidewalks together with occasional yellow shaded street lights.

Seonghwa feels unease creep onto his spine, making him shiver. He has a bad feeling about them being out on their own at night. Drunk people everywhere.

The poor thing shivers again, thinking about people dragging themselves over the stone streets after having taken in too much alcohol for them to handle.

Hongjoong suddenly trips, but he stays on his feet, just dropping his bag. For a moment he just lets himself fall down in a crouch, his head dropping as he sobs.

_ He must feel so defeated.. _ Seonghwa bites his lip to try and keep himself from running over and comfort his best friend.

Hongjoong kicks a little stone on the ground as he walks, sniffling every once in a while, also wiping his tears.

Seonghwa’s phone buzzes and he takes it out of his pocket. Yeosang.

\- **Where are you?**

**\- Hongjoong hyung is gone too.**

Seonghwa sighs and puts his phone away, only to have it buzz again. The blonde bites his lip as he looks again, the screen bright in his face.

Jongho.

\- **I hope you talk it out while you’re outside..**

**\- Stay safe okay hyung?**

Seonghwa’s face shows a sad smile, but he can’t bring himself to reply, just sniffing as he puts his phone back into his pocket again.

His eyes look for Hongjoong again, who is now looking up at the sky, probably trying to hold back tears. The sight pulls at Seonghwa’s heartstrings severely and the tall young man balls his fists. 

_ Hongjoong probably doesn’t even want to see me right now, anyone _ ** _but _ ** _ me.. _Seonghwa feels tears well up in his eyes but he swallows them down, looking up at the sky just like Hongjoong did.

When the older looks back forward again Hongjoong disappeared. Seonghwa’s eyes go wide and his heart jumps into his throat as only a fallen over bag remains on the street in front of him.

But Hongjoong wasn’t far, right where he was standing was an alleyway, a little bit in front of Seonghwa.

Joong’s feet kick wildly as they drag across the rough surface of the stones on the alley. His hands are clasped around the arm around his chest and the hand pressed down on his mouth.

Hongjoong’s ears are ringing loudly as panic races through his veins. _ No no no no!! Someone help me! Please no I-I need to go home! Please!!! _

When the two guys reach the middle of the alley the one holding Hongjoong throws him to the ground.

Hongjoong smacks down on his forearms, his head slamming against his arm at the impact. He whimpers as his knees and bare arms scratch against the stones.

“See I told you it’s him hyung!” The taller guy almost giggles as he points at Hongjoong like he’s some kind of price.

“Are you sure he’s an ATEEZ member?” The smaller male with the mask growls, the taller flinches in response, but also moves forward in a mocking way, acting like he wants to punch the guy in front of him.

“_ Yes _ , Kim Hongjoong, _ leader _ of ATEEZ, I’m very sure hyung, ask him yourself!” He says as he straightens his back. He pulls an ugly face at the other.

Hongjoong has just flipped himself on his back as the older man crouches down in front of him, very close to him.

“Seungjin here says you’re the leader of ATEEZ, is that true?” He asks, pulling his mask off. He raises his eyebrow as he waits for Hongjoong to answer him.

Tho, the redhead isn’t sure if he should answer or not, scared, terrified even, of what’s going to happen to him if he answers truthfully. Hongjoong shuffles backwards carefully, his breath short and hitching.

“Cat’s got your tongue? I asked you something.” The, what seems to be, leader of the two guys growls at Joong and he flinches badly, turning his face away as fear runs through his veins.

The shorter man stands up, grabbing Hongjoong by the collar and lifting him up together with him. “Guess I should teach you some manners.” He mutters, clearly annoyed.

He grabs Joong by the throat and slams him against the wall of the alley, slowly dragging him up against it, causing Hongjoong to just reach the floor with his tippy toes.

Hongjoong immediately grabs the hand at his throat, gasping and struggling in his grasp. His legs fling around while also trying to reach the floor.

The horrible situation gets cut off by a yell.

“Hongjoong!!” The shout echoes into the alley gently, but it hits the people in it with force.

Hongjoong is petrified hearing Seonghwa’s voice in this situation, while the two men in front of him light up with delight at hearing a confirmation for their question.

“Oh my god hyung!! That’s Seonghwa’s voice!” The younger squeals as he makes a happy jump.

The older’s grin turns into a twisted expression somewhere between scheming and delighted. “Get him Seungjin.”

Hongjoong’s eyes go wide. “N-No!!” He chokes out, clenching his teeth and squeezing his eyes shut as he sucks in air.

_ The taller, but younger guys has muscles, he’s taller than Seonghwa as well.. _Hongjoong’s mind goes into overdrive, but his thinking is cut off by a yelp coming from right outside the alley.

Not a moment later the young man returns, pulling Seonghwa with him by his hair. Blood trickles down the side of his face, his head clearly having been hit with something.

The guy drops Seonghwa at the other man’s feet and the latter releases Hongjoong, who drops to the floor.

“Woah he’s a pretty one Seungjinnie..” He mumbles as he takes Seonghwa’s chin into his hand, turning Hwa’s face as he studies his delicate features.

Seonghwa’s lips are pale and he’s covered in sweat from the blood loss. He pants and has his eyes closed as he sits sideways, heavily leaning onto the ground.

“Seonghwa..!” Hongjoong whisper yells to the other, reaching for his hand. The man in front of both of them looks at Hongjoong, shooting daggers with his eyes.

Hongjoong swallows and Seonghwa tries to stand up, shaking his head out of the man’s grip. After regaining some strength he stands up.

What the two didn’t know was that Seonghwa had called Yeosang when he heard Hongjoong yell. Unfortunately his phone did get thrown out of his hand mid call when he got hit on the head with that glass bottle.

Seonghwa moves past the man, trying to stay focused and calm as he crouches down next to Hongjoong, taking him into his arms. “I got you Joongie..”

The older man fumes. “Dohyun hyung..” Seungjin swallows. “He called someone.” The tall boy shows Seonghwa’s phone with Yeosang in the call history less than 4 minutes ago. “Seonghwa called another band member.”

Dohyun steps towards Seonghwa and the latter braces himself, wanting to protect the shaken Hongjoong.

“Little brat.” The man grabs Seonghwa once again by his hair, giving a harsh pull.

Hwa tries not to budge, his expression scrunching up in pain as his grip on Hongjoong tightens sharply. The latter wraps his arms around Seonghwa as well, not willing to let the bad guy take him away.

The painful and mean feelings that were left in the members after the fight seem to disappear like snow in the sun. Survival, that’s all that counts right now.

At that moment Seungjin steps in with a sneak attack, pushing a cloth on Hongjoong mouth, causing him to breathe in the chloroform.

As Hongjoong loses consciousness Seonghwa is distracted and Dohyun grabs his chance, grabbing Seonghwa’s arm and pulling him away from his friend.

“Let me go! Hongjoong!” Seonghwa struggles, but soon starts panting again from the open wound on his head. His eyes start to lose focus and his skin turns even whiter than before.

A snapping sound is heard and a flash of light temporarily blinds Seonghwa. His face gets grabbed without any care as another snap follows together with a flash.

The men don’t leave Seonghwa with any time to process what happened as a car drives into the alley. Through the spots Seonghwa notices the tight ropes around his best friend and soon he himself is in the same situation.

The tall boy throws Hongjoong onto his shoulder as the leader of the two does the same with a confused Seonghwa.

The two ATEEZ members get thrown into the back of the car like limp rag dolls and Seonghwa groans as he lands on top of Hongjoong. Just like that the door closes loudly and they drive away not much later.  


Some time after the boys got taken away Yeosang and San arrive at the spot where everything happened. It wasn’t even that far away from their dorm..

“San! Joong hyung’s bag!” Yeosang yells over his shoulder as he squats down next to the messy bag. “It’s definitely hyung’s..”

San runs over and the two pick up his bag before jogging further down the street, soon finding the alley as they look around.

Yeosang starts to tremble as he spots the blood on the stones, but San just swallows hard, grabbing Yeosang’s hand tightly and moving into the alley.

“We have to find them.” He says sternly, his eyes staring down at the two pictures on the ground. San stares at Hongjoong’s bruised neck, the signs of strangulation flash against his pale skin. The tape on their leader’s mouth looks like it had been _ slapped _on.

“Yeosang don’t look.” San covers Yeosang’s eyes as he now looks at Seonghwa. “W-Why not San?” Yeosang’s heavily trembling hand finds San’s on his face and slowly pulls it down.

Seonghwa’s face looks unhealthily pale and blood covers the left side of it, the half dried up liquid having been smudged by the hand that’s squeezing Hwa’s face painfully hard. His white purple-ish lips alarm both the men looking at the pictures.

“What the fuck did they _ do _ to them Yeosang…” San’s eyes water as he grits his teeth, letting out an angry growl.

Yeosang falls to his knees in horror, tightly keeping his hold on San’s hand as he covers his mouth, trying his best not to vomit.

“The police, we need to go to the police Yeosang, please we need to be strong we need to _ save _them!” San picks up the pictures and Seonghwa’s phone, helping up Yeosang after.

He wants to comfort his distressed friend, but they _ need _ to be strong, they need to be focused and get their members out of the place they’re being held.

_ We’re their only hope. _


	3. Fear is like poison, dangerous and lethal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i just want to put up a warning for this and coming chapters because shits about to go down and get real psychotic so i advise you to be careful and to not read it if it might be triggering!! ⚠️

Hongjoong groans as he starts blinking at a fast pace, his eyes adjusting to the slight darkness of dusk. The man feels his body aches all over, but it’s not  _ pain _ it’s just very sore.

A chain rattles around his ankle as he moves to sit up and the sound slams into his ear canal, his senses still being very sensitive after being out for almost a whole day.

The redhead slowly looks around, trying to scan his surroundings, but only finding the chain on his leg and a big blob next to him, the figure blurred by his hazy sight.

The leader takes a moment to think, recalling what happened yesterday evening and immediately starts patting the ground around him frantically.

“Seonghwa! S-Seonghwa!!” He whimpers in blind panic, finally having his hand meet the blob he saw a moment ago, realizing it’s in fact, Seonghwa.

A weak sound comes from the eldest as he starts panting as soon as he starts awakening.

“H-Hey Hwa are you okay? Your wound! How’s your wound?” Joong gently runs his hands over Seonghwa’s body, searching for his face.

“Hongjoong..?” Seonghwa sounds bad, he’s shivering and his voice is soft. The taller moves, his head stinging as he does.

Sitting up slowly he notices a sharp feeling on his wrists.. Cuffs. He pulls, letting out a choked cry as the steel digs into his already hurt wrists. His ankles, compared to Hongjoong, are both chained.

“Seonghwa!” Hongjoong is frantic as he hears his brother, too frantic for Seonghwa’s poor pounding head.

“I-I’m okay don’t worry.. I just hurt my wrists in these cuffs…” The singer closes his eyes for a moment before taking on the challenge of letting his eyes adjust to the darkness around them. 

It’s late in the evening so that means they were out for a day. Maybe a little less than that. They’re outside for sure, judging from the wind and the cold. The dirt underneath them also gives it away a little.

“Where are we Joongie..” Seonghwa speaks, his throat sore, just like everything else. He finally sees Hongjoong in front of him. He can see his worried face and the fear in his eyes.

“I don’t know.. They… They took us somewhere. It sounds like the countryside, it’s way too silent to be near the city.” Hongjoong remains rational after regaining his calm.

Seonghwa sighs, allowing his heavy body to fall against Hongjoong’s chest. “Hold me Hongjoong.. Please….”

At first the rapper is startled, thinking Seonghwa fainted, but he can’t help but tear up at his friend’s words. “Of course Seongie.. Are you tired? Does something hurt?” He mumbles, making it comfortable for both of them as he gently caresses Seonghwa’s hair.

Seonghwa mumbles something, but Hongjoong can’t hear him very well. “Hm?” He hums to let the other know he didn’t understand him.

“I feel weird.. I think they treated my wound, but I still feel weak.” Seonghwa silently repeats himself, seeming to be lost in thoughts.

Hongjoong fumbles with the cuffs around Hwa’s porcelain wrists, hoping he’ll somehow find a weak spot and break them open. He pulls and moves the cuffs, but Seonghwa flinches against Hongjoong’s chest, whining.

“Sorry, sorry..! I was trying to find a way to get them off..” Hongjoong sounds sullen, feeling defeated. “They aren’t amateurs.. They knew if they left my hands free they’d have to lock you down with something better than ropes or tape.”

The mood of the situation had turned lighter when Seonghwa asked for skinship, but the moment is ruined again once the two remember the severity of the predicament they’re in.

Hongjoong swallows and bites his lip.

Seonghwa squeezes his eyes shut for a moment, sucking in some air all of a sudden. A sharp inhale follows as he turns his head like he’s in pain.

“Hongjoong my neck.. They're here. I-I can’t stay awake…” Hongjoong first reacts startled, worried about Seonghwa groaning and gasping, but he then frowns at his words, confused.

He looks at Seonghwa’s neck and notices a tiny dart as he quickly pulls it out, throwing it away. “No, no! Seonghwa! Stay! Awake!” He holds Seonghwa’s face.

The older looks at him with pain in his half closed eyes before letting them roll back into his head as he goes limp. His arms drop on his back and his head falls sideways in Hongjoong’s grip.

“Seonghwa!!” Hongjoong quickly looks up, pulling his brother close and wrapping his arms around him protectively. “Monsters!!!”

The man who was called Dohyun smirks before letting out a breathy laugh. “I need him to be pretty when my clients come pick him up this saturday.”

The rappers thoughts start racing again. Saturday, that’s in 4 days. “What do you mean, ‘client’?!” Hongjoong growls, teeth bare as he stands up.

Seonghwa now lays behind him, Hongjoong standing like a shield in front of his precious brother.

The man steps towards Hongjoong as he grabs his hair tightly, yanking his head back and using his other hand to take a firm grip on the prey’s throat.

Hongjoong scratches at the hand on his throat as he coughs, still holding his growling and threatening posture even though he’s in deep shit now.

“Don’t act tough.” Dohyun sneers. ”I can break you with ease, but my little friend wants to have you.” He grabs Hongjoong’s face now instead of his throat. “Little plaything…”

Hongjoong once again growls, baring his teeth for as far as that’s physically possible with his cheeks being pressed together.

“Unhand me.” He sneers. Hongjoong’s chest swells with anger, the chain on his ankle feeling heavier than before.  _ At least I can use my hands..  _ Hongjoong thinks about Seonghwa’s position and sets his mind to protecting him.

The dangerous man in front of the duo tightens his grip in Hongjoong’s hair, causing the latter to let out a contorted noise. He gives a strong pull before flinging Hongjoong against the ground.

The rapper cries out as a crack is heard. Luckily it’s not one of his bones that cracked, but he broke a plank with his shoulder when he landed on it.

Dohyun seems unbothered, not really caring for the leader as he makes his way over to Seonghwa. He takes his time as he fishes the key for the chains out of his back pocket.

He starts unlocking the chains on Seonghwa’s ankles, while leaving the damned cuffs on his broken skinned wrists.

Hongjoong stands up, holding his shoulder as it throbs badly from the blow. “Stay away from him..” He whispers, stepping forward. Hongjoong sways badly.

At that moment he trips, crashing down once more. The air is knocked straight out of his chest as he whimpers, his fingers clawing at the soil underneath him.

He tries his utmost best to go forward, crawling if he has to. Groans and huffs are forced out of him as he struggles, but it’s all for nothing. His head drops as he’s out cold.   
  


When Seonghwa awakens his chest is bare and his instinct is to cover it immediately. His arms move, but his wrists get held closely by the cuffs holding them captive.

He whines, turning his body sideways, trying his best to hide his chest. He breathes heavily as he looks around, fear flickering in his eyes.

“We just bathed you Seonghwa, nothing to be worried about..” A girl in front of him smiles. Seonghwa looks horrified.  _ They undressed me? _

“We have the women to take care of people like you, while the men prefer people like Hongjoong.”

Seonghwa’s eyes have turned big, almost doe-like as they sparkle with distress. “What is this place?” He chokes out. His hands shake in the cuffs as he pulls his feet closer to his hips.

“Well shortly said, we find and rescue people and clean them up, finding them better homes.” The girl still looks like she’s beaming with joy, even though she knows what happened to Seonghwa and Hongjoong and it’s truly frightening to Hwa.

“But we have to hurry up, they’re starting on Hongjoong soon.” She continues, opening the cuffs to dress Seonghwa.

This might seem like the chance to rebel, escape, fight back,  _ anything _ . But no, there’s a man standing behind the woman, a knife on his hip and a gun on his chest.

Seonghwa follows the instructions of his captors and gets dressed. He doesn’t dare to be slow and nor does he dare to ask any questions.

When one button doesn’t cooperate Seonghwa’s hands start to tremble, making it even harder to actually button the last piece on his blouse.

The woman in front of him lifts her hand and Seonghwa can’t control his body when he flinches, breathing hard as he shields himself with his arms.

A soft coo is heard from in front of him and Seonghwa feels tears sting in his eyes. “Honey no need for that I was only gonna fix that button for you.” She reaches for his chest, brushing his skin with one of her sharp nails as she does what she said she was going to do.

After he’s done they put makeup on him, simply put,  _ confusing  _ Seonghwa a lot. Soon he’d understand it though.   
  


Hongjoong opened his eyes to his hands being strapped onto a chair. He dropped his head against his chest as he strains his neck, groaning as pain erupted once again from all the points he’s been hit.

His eyes caught a glimpse of something on the floor and when he moved to take a better look he noticed the heaps of pictures on the floor, scattered around his feet.

_ They were all pictures of him _ ..

He saw pictures of him in a van, pictures of him and Seonghwa together, of them outside. He shivered as horror grabs a hold of his brain. Pictures of Hongjoong with tears in his eyes, with his hands tied above his head.

Hongjoong tried to reach the pictures to kick them away, but his ankles are tightly strapped down as well.

“Awe Joongie you shouldn’t want to harm my treasures it’s very hurtful..” Seungjin chimed as he pulled the leather strap extra tight on the leader’s wrist.

Hongjoong let out a noise as he frowns, his wrist hurting from the force and pressure being put on it so suddenly.

“Sick bastard..” He huffed. His emotions kept shifting, anger, fear, horror, fury. The rapper struggled in the chair.

“Don’t call me that Hongjoong..” Seungjin sounded on edge, but not very threatening.

But Hongjoong isn’t afraid to bite back. “I call you what you are.. And I have to say.. You’re a monster.” His tone was mocking, fake playful as he crawled underneath Seungjin’s skin. He provoked him out of anger, which was a wrong move.

“Oh Joongie..” Seungjin giggled, his head rolling all the way back as he started laughing harder. He continued as he walked away, “You know.. I  _ was _ going to just take pretty pictures.. But now I’m just  _ craving _ even  ** _prettier_ ** pictures….” 

The way he spoke left Hongjoong feeling very unsettled, anxious. He bit his lip as he turned around in the hopes of seeing what Seungjin was doing.

The rattling sound of loose wheels underneath some kind of cart approached Hongjoong from the back and slowly an instrumental table came rolling into view.

Right at that moment the door opens to reveal a shaking but stunning looking Seonghwa, accompanied by the woman and man who were ‘watching over him’ earlier.

“Hongjoong!” Seonghwa immediately runs towards him, only just avoiding the grasping claws of the woman behind him.

With his hands now cuffed in front of him instead of on his back he’s able to grasp Hongjoong’s face, cupping it and just holding him.

But their moment is once again ruined by someone as Seonghwa’s neck gets caught in a strong grip. “Here you little brat.” The menacing looking man who was with Seonghwa tosses the boy onto the group like he’s a stuffed animal, sending him sliding almost all the way back.

Seonghwa gasps as hell smacks onto the floor, not being able to stop himself when he flies through the room. The slippery floor doesn’t help with his suit.

“Be gentle!!” Hongjoong cries out in despair, yanking on his wrists. He wants to run to Seonghwa, he has to protect him!

“I’m fine Hongjoong! Don’t worry about me!” Seonghwa smiles, still catching his breath, but he tries his best to shake off the fear, now that he’s with Joong again.

“Okay!!” Seungjin shouts, startling both the boys. “Now that everyone’s here,” He continues, grinning from ear to ear. “let the photo shoot..  ** _begin_ ** ..”


	4. Survival instincts kicking in

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i think this will be the last chapter? i might add like a “post credits” chapter not sure :(
> 
> WARNING this chapter contains sedatives, gunshots, blood, death, torture

Seungjin amps up the electricity as Hongjoong drools, his body not under his own control anymore. He pants as saliva involuntarily drips off his lip.

Seonghwa’s throat burns as he cries and screams, being held in his place by both the woman and the man.

Pictures are being taken at every moment and Hongjoong is about to faint. Seungjin notices and stops the machine. “Let’s take a 5 minute break everyone.. Let Seonghwa clean Hongjoong up.” He doesn’t seem that excited anymore.

Seonghwa has been released and the two are left alone, locked in the hall.

The older scurries over to Hongjoong as fast as he can. Tears have dried up on his face, making his cheeks dry and irritated.

“Hongjoong Hongjoong Hongjoong..!” He whispers, trying to get the young adult in front of him to lift his head.

Hongjoong can’t stop panting yet, but he regains some sense of strength. He blinks slowly as he heaves his head, sucking the saliva back into his dry mouth.

“Seonghwa..” He whispers, smiling as he closes his eyes for a moment.

The raven haired boy hugs Hongjoong’s head against his chest, keeping him as close as possible as he allows the other to catch his breath.

These seconds feel like ages of bliss as the two reconnect. “We have to get out of here, they’re going to sell you Seonghwa..”

Seonghwa’s eyes widen. Fear sets itself into his system after hearing this new information. “T-They can’t.. I’m a human! Not an object!” He feels like he can’t breathe.

“Seonghwa! I need you to focus... Try getting me loose...” Hongjoong coughs after raising his voice like that.

A fierce shout from Hongjoong snaps him back to reality as he swallows down the horror, huffing and puffing out his chest in order to calm himself.

Seonghwa pulls on the leather straps, finding the buckle soon enough and tugging it loose. As Hongjoong releases his other hand Seonghwa kneels down to get his ankle.

Hongjoong stands up as soon as he’s free, holding onto the older as they search for a way out. Seonghwa steps forward carefully since the other feels a bit weak.

His eyes scan the room, not missing an inch as he looks for an escape possibility. The long locks of his raven hair fall over his eyes as he looks around. Then he notices a high and narrow window, open as if it was put there on purpose for them to escape.

** _Meanwhile with the others_ **

“So they found the location where Hongjoong and Seonghwa hyung are?” Jongho asks, eyes big with hope, but a hint of anger also flickers in his orbs.

“Yes. But they say it might be dangerous so they have to wait until they can get in there,” Yeosang sneers. He feels so disgusted by the police for not getting their friends out of there immediately, “god knows what they’re doing to them!” 

Everyone turned to San now that the two oldest are gone. He might not be the oldest but to them he’s as reliable and smart as a leader.

“Yeosang..” San rests his hand on his brother’s shoulder to calm him. A smile forms on his face before he speaks, “That’s exactly why we’re going in ourselves.”

** _Back to Seonghwa and Hongjoong_ **

“Hongjoong grab my hand!” Seonghwa whisper yells at his friend. He’s hanging from a high window, Hongjoong standing on the surgical table as he reaches for the other’s hand.

Seonghwa pulls the leader through the window with him and they crash onto the floor on the other side of the hall. The raven haired boy luckily caught the weakened Hongjoong, but the fall wasn’t pretty.

“Let’s go..” Seonghwa groans as they stand up, holding his head with his left hand and Hongjoong’s hand with his right.

After a little while Hongjoong takes the lead, sneaking through the building. At that moment they hear voices, familiar ones. Seonghwa and Hongjoong duck backwards behind a corner.

Dohyun’s voice echoes their way, “So why exactly did you lose my prize Seungjin?” He sounds angry. “Hyung I-I was just playing with Hongjoong when we took a break and when I returned they were both gone!” He stutters, as if he’s afraid of Dohyun.

Seonghwa squeezes Hongjoong’s hand hard all of a sudden, causing the younger to look around. He finds Seonghwa being sedated by the girl from earlier.

A needle being pricked into his neck as tears fill his eyes. The poor boy tries his best to keep holding onto Hongjoong as he slowly goes more and more limp.

This was their chance! They could’ve escaped!

Hongjoong fills with anger as he lunges forward, pulling the needle from Seonghwa and slamming it into the woman’s arm.

She doesn’t even make a sound as she starts to sway, going limp against the wall and losing consciousness as she slides down.

Hongjoong pants from the adrenaline rush in his veins. His eyes go to Seonghwa who’s now out, leaning heavily onto Joong.

He breathes in deeply before lifting the other over his back. Hurrying away as he can still hear the two attacker’s voices nearby.

With his heart in his throat and his mind hazy he flees from the danger. After maybe an hour he makes it out of the building, not believing his own eyes as he sees the forest, covered in the darkness of dusk.

They were in there for almost two days. He can’t believe it. It’s almost Thursday..

“Hyung!” The voice sounds like an angel as Hongjoong looks around. “Where.. San!” He mumbles to himself, stepping forward as it his leg’s have a mind of their own, screaming at him to run towards the voice.

Seonghwa feels heavier and heavier on his back as his legs almost give away.

“Hyung!!” The voice changes, confusing Hongjoong as he stops in his tracks. The hope in the voice has been replaced by fear and it worries Hongjoong.

“Stop right there.” Seungjin’s voice sounds awfully close and followed right after the words is the cold feeling of a gun being pressed against the back of Hongjoong’s head.

“Give him to me and you’re free to go.”

The words are horrendously simple, but Hongjoong has never felt worse in his life, hearing those words.

His hands on Seonghwa’s legs grab him just a bit tighter, making him hug his body just a bit closer. As if it will prevent others to take Seonghwa away from Hongjoong.

“No..” He whispers, his voice shakes as Hongjoong speaks, fear zooming around in his body.

“Oh really?” Seungjin just laughs, as if there was a funny joke being said instead of deadly threats. “I don’t think that’s the right answer Hongjoong.”

The leader shakes his head. “It is.. I won’t let you torture him further.” He grits his teeth as the gun gets pushed a bit harder against his scalp.

“You pick.. A bullet for you, a bullet for your friends,  _ or _ Seonghwa is handed over…. to me..”

Hongjoong keeps shaking his head, his eyes going wide as he feels the gun leave his head. Then everything goes fast.

Hongjoong turns, letting Seonghwa move from his back to his arm in front of him. Hongjoong starts reaching for the gun as he yells out a “No!” in horror. Simultaneously someone screams duck and everyone automatically ducks, but not Seungjin, as he gets shot straight in the chest.

Hongjoong’s ears ring loudly as he hugs Seonghwa to his chest, covering him and protecting him from the blood flying off of Seungjin at the impact.

Hands cover the two soon after, voices swimming above Hongjoong’s head but because of the ringing he can’t make out what exactly they are saying. He looks up, seeing multiple cops around them.

_The cops? How.. When did they get here? How did they know where they were, why didn’t they come earlier? Wait, the others.. What about the other members are they safe? We’re they hurt?_

So many thoughts swim through Hongjoong’s head as it pounds, the ringing becoming a bit painful.

One checks if Seungjin is alive, shaking her head after putting her fingers underneath his jaw bone. “He’s dead.” The female cop states.

Others are trying to talk to Hongjoong, or trying to get to Seonghwa to check his condition. “No.. No don’t touch him.” Hongjoong whimpers as he feels someone trying to lift Seonghwa up.

“It’s okay we’re just going to check his condition.” Someone calmly says, but Hongjoong cries out, “Get away don’t touch Seonghwa!!”

San and the others rush to their brothers, talking to them but also just grabbing onto them, glad that they’re not badly hurt.

“Hyung it’s us, is Seonghwa hyung okay? Let us see him.” Yunho whispers, tears in his eyes as he sees Hongjoong cling onto a seemingly unconscious Seonghwa for dear life.

He finally looks up at the members, giving some room to Seonghwa. Surprisingly the latter had woken up. The sound of the gunshot shook him awake. The sedatives were deep, but since not the whole syringe was emptied inside his veins he woke up after an hour and a half.

The members let out varies noises of relief as they see their dear brother awake and relatively unharmed. “Hongjoong..” Seonghwa’s first word reaches the leaders ears and the two hug, feeling each other’s heartbeats and warmth as they get taken away into the ambulance.

**Author's Note:**

> feel free to leave comments about what you liked or if you have feedback! it really helps with the motivation! thank you <3
> 
> always keep in mind to be kind uwu


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